Now Playing: Rain, outside my window
Last night, I and about 15 of my classmates performed the Vagina Monologues at HUC. What an experience!!!! Now, I've done some theatre in my life, but this was unlike any other theatre that I've ever experienced. For one, we all had a huge part in what we were producing. We gave input, had very open auditions, and collaborated on everything from the 'zine we published, to the causes we were giving money to, to doing costumes, makeup and decorations. This was a truley a "group" project, and I couldn' have enjoyed it more.
Secondly, for some women in our group, this was the first time they had ever performed in any kind of "serious" acting atmosphere. And this is a really hard topic to just jump right in to. I mean, I take for granted how comfortable I am with all of this material, but for others it was a real struggle. But they knew just how important it was to be a part of it all, so they let themselves struggle, and they grew from it. Watching me and my castmates grow during this production into confident women and actresses was an incredible blessing.
Third, I cried on stage. I was performing a piece about women in Islamabad, Pakistan who are victims of abuse by their husbands, and I cried. I didn't think I would, but I was in the moment and I was thinking about all the women that I was representing, at that second, who would never EVER have the chance to speak out like I was doing. Who would never have the chance to say the things I said last night, and who had been tortured or who had died as a result of abuse, neglect,or worse. I pulled it off, but after I got off stage (and the two other girls who were in the scene with me got off stage) we had a crying moment. Sometimes, theatre is not all fun and games, but there is an importance to it that needs to get conveyed to the audience. Well, I don't know if they got it last night....but I know I'll never forget it.
Finally, it felt good to be back on the stage again. The last time I was in a real production was about 6 years ago...and until last night, I forgot how much I missed it. There's so much work that goes in to brining a character or set of characters to an audience, but the rewards are incredible. Although I'm not going to drop out of rabbinical school and become a professional actress (as someone suggested I ought to, last night) it doesn't mean that I don't have room for both roles in my life. I want to make my career out of Judaism, and I want to leave and eat and breathe my Judaism....but that doesn't mean that I can't have hobbies.
You know how people always say: Take time for yourself, do what makes you happy.
Well, I guess I've figured out that this is also what makes me happy, and I shouldn't give it up just because I feel too busy or too tired, or too burntout on other stuff. Do what you love and love what you do!!! I know I'm really going to start trying to do just that......